I caught the second half of the finale of "Seinfeld" earlier this evening, and it got me to thinking: is there really a "Good Samaritan Law" in effect anywhere in the U.S. of A.? One that says that a citizen has to interfere whenever he/she sees a crime being committed and do his/her best to help anyone being victimized? (That's what got the Seinfeld gang a year in prison.)
If there is such a law, what are the parameters? If the crime-committing perpetrator is carrying a weapon (gun) in plain sight, does the witness still have to brave a bullet to the brainpan to render assistance to a dope who won't give up his wallet and the thirteen dollars it contains, or will just phoning the cops suffice? What if the witness is an eighty year old woman or a thirteen year old wheelchair rider? Do they go to the slam if they decide that discretion most definitely is the better part of valor?
If the law's real, just what would you old reprobates do in a typical situation? Jump the jerk or jump for cover?
I've been on the wrong side of law breaking activities (though not for years and years -- in case anyone's monitoring this site -- and never armed), and I know that I wouldn't want to try to stop an eleven-year-old, adrenalin-high me as I raced, shitting my pants, out of a convenience store with the contents of the cash register in my hands.
As "Mr. Pink" (Steve Buscemi) says in RESERVOIR DOGS, "The choice between ten years or moving some dumbass civilian out of my way is no choice at all." Pete "the Cowardly" Leo.


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